Cathy’s son Walter was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder. During a Mental Health crisis, Cathy called 911 for help. Armed officers came four times, laughing at Walter’s behavior before finally shooting him dead in the street in front of his family and friends. His kids gave interviews to the news as Cathy wept.
Julie’s son Jay was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder. During his second suicide attempt in two days, Jay’s friends called 911 for help. An armed officer showed up and, despite finding Jay in the process of overdosing, cuffed him and threw him in the back seat, banging his head off the side of his car in the process.
Neither was committing a crime. Both were suffering from struggles of Mental Health which, in the US, means you’re less than human. You’re hidden away like our President’s tax returns or Joe Biden’s history of overt racism. But this is where their similarities ended.
Walter was Black. Jay is white. Walter was poor. Jay came from wealth. Walter is dead. I’m alive.
Invariably, whenever I tell my story, someone always reaches out to tell me it wouldn’t go down that way today. An ambulance would come, they assure me. And maybe that’s true. Eventually. But Walter’s death teaches us, if so, it’s only because, somehow, my white skin is a greater shield, worth more in leverage in 2020 than it was in 2009. That’s not progress, and there’s nothing there to celebrate.
They still don’t care about us. They never have. And it’s hard to see how they ever will.
Don’t believe me? In 2021, the National Institute of Health is dedicating $87 Million to research on Bipolar Disorder, DOWN $3 Million from last year. To put that in perspective, Aging will receive $4,724,000, almost $5 BILLION. Inflammatory Bowl Disease will receive more than double what Bipolar Disorder is granted.[1]
Judging from those numbers, you’d think Bipolar Disorder, or Mental Health care as a whole, is something our elected leaders simply don’t talk about. Which most people don’t (stigma is ALIIIIIIVE and well).
I mean if the old adage of ‘show me your budget, I’ll tell you what you value’ is true, our elected leaders in both parties, and those who serve them, simply do not care about Mental Health. There’s no way to take any other message away from that budget. They do, not, care. And yet…
They talk about it all the time.
In July, our leaders, including the President and his chief lapdog Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell, called for schools to open, citing the Mental Health of our children as the primary reason to ignore the international pandemic that has killed millions and altered the lives of millions more. [2]
In August of 2019, after mass shootings in Dayton and El Paso, President Trump said these atrocities are a Mental Health problem, going as far as saying “mental illness and hatred pulls the trigger, not the gun.” In the same speech, he called those with mental illness who commit violent acts “monsters.” [3]
But it’s not just Republicans. Democrats are just as guilty. In a press release in July of 2019, Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer called for “all hands on deck” to treat the severe crisis of suicide and Mental Health struggles. [4]
Yet nothing has changed. No, let me fix that. They’re taking money AWAY from Bipolar research. So something has changed. It’s getting worse.
Mental Health will always be the bridesmaid they blame for getting too drunk at the party and knocking over the cake, but never the bride.
I’ll say it again; they don’t care about us. Their budget shows that. And I don’t see how this will ever be different.
Yet, somehow, it’s 10x worse when the person suffering is Black, or Brown, in this ol’ country of ours.
Millions, yes, millions, have protested demanding a change to policing in this country. And still our elected leaders have run away from that issue faster than when their wives find their girlfriend’s number in their phones. Many still hide behind the ‘bad apples’ excuse and claim reforms and better hiring practices can do the trick, ignoring the fact that we’ve done all that.
Yes, we’ve done all that.
Philadelphia has a behavioral health specialist in their 911 call center and their officers have supposedly undergone de-escalation training.[5]
None of that mattered to Walter. Walter is still just as dead.
You can’t reform away this issue because its tentacles are everywhere.
As children we play with army men, glorifying the killing of those our government deems bad guys. Shocker we’re at a point where we honestly can’t name how many wars errrr international disputes we’re currently embroiled in.
Movies like Bad Boys, shows like Law And Order, they entertain us with a fantasy of a system that, sure, has a few bugs, but it gets it right most of the time.
Clearly these are fantasy on par with Xena: Warrior Princess.
But it doesn’t stop there. We shrug it off when news outlets victim blame, usually the “well, if he wasn’t carrying those drugs” story, and use words like ‘Junkie’, ‘Addict’, and ‘Fiend’ to talk about those who struggle with Substance Misuse. Countless studies have shown how much harm this does.
And we see it play out time and time and time again in in our criminal justice system where entire generations of Black boys, children, are swept up and thrown away like garbage at the same time little Chet, Chip and Hunter across town are doing the same damn thing.
The real world is messy. And we hate messy. Trust me, I know. As a guy with OCD, my brain screams bangs shorts and smokes and I get antsy and stressed when things are out of order for me; when I struggle to wrap everything up and make it pretty and neat and clean.
But that’s not life.
Things are never as Black and white as they seem. That is, except the skin that kept me alive and ensured Walter would end up dead.
I feel for Cathy and the mothers just like her.
My mother gets to have me around. My mother gets time to understand what goes on inside my brain.
Cathy doesn’t.
And yet the cops walk free.
Because the murderers always walk free.
As long as they wear a badge.
Defund the police.
Black Lives Matter.
(Editor’s note: an earlier edition of this story disparaged the funding for Lupus. At the time, I wasn’t aware of the disparity in Lupus cases and meant no offense toward those who suffer. Now that I’ve been educated as to what Lupus actually is, it’s clear it deserves way more research funding. In fact, that segment isn’t to say we should reduce funding for crucial research (I actually have IBS), but to illustrate how little Bipolar research gets by comparison.
Feedback received and appreciated!)
[1] https://report.nih.gov/categorical_spending.aspx
[2] https://www.courier-journal.com/story/news/politics/2020/07/08/cdc-guidelines-school-reopenings-mitch-mcconnell-trump-differ/5399417002/
[3] https://www.businessinsider.com/trump-wrong-mental-illness-pulls-the-trigger-guns-2019-8
[4] https://www.schumer.senate.gov/newsroom/press-releases/following-severe-uptick-of-suicide-deaths-in-central-ny-and-nationwide-schumer-launches-three-pronged-plan-to-combat-the-devastating-trend-pointing-to-the-highest-suicide-rate-in-decades-schumer-says-all-hands-on-deck-are-needed-to-reach-more-people-in-pain_save-precious-lives
